VOICE OF THE CLOWN

VOICE OF THE CLOWN

Here I am, a clown, night after night
I make them laugh, applaud, smile
With my pantomime, dumb show
They think it's an act
That after the show I go back to my real self
What if they knew there is no me?
What they see is what they get?

A long time ago I have decided to become
what everyone already thought I was
A clown
To them I was nothing but a clown anyway
Jittery, jumpy, twitching and stuttering
Gay and small and vulnerable

What I would like
What I would really like?
For you to see right through me
right into my heart, and kiss me?
Hear my voice and have patience
let me speak my words
of humanity, of being human

Make me feel human again?
Wrap your arms around this
small twitching frame
And hold me.


***

poem by Darren White
Written for Goodreads YA LGBT Group
September 2016 prompt